The Candle (one poem - two versions)

by hirsutemal

Although most of the drafts for these two versions of the same poem were written in January 1991 (during phase two of the First Gulf War), subsequently modified in 2005, I am still unable to decide which is the final version. Each version has its merits and no doubt their flaws too.

THE CANDLE (Version I)

Waiting to break

this happy equilibrium

the flames shaft

laps the glowing air.

Today the bombs

fall on Baghdad –

I watch the candle burn.

A patterned globe

of wax emits

a subtle fragrance –

no flesh is burning

here in my room.

Is this the flame

that purifies –

surgically pue?

An opening of the door –

a minor turbulence,

the flame now licks

the candles side.

The meltdown of the globe

begins so casually.

Malcolm Evison

*************************

THE CANDLE (Version II)

A patterned globe

of wax emits

a subtle fragrance.

The flames shaft

laps the glowing air

waiting to break

this happy equilibrium.

Is this the flame

that purifies

whilst commentators whine

of surgical strikes.

Open the door, create

a minor turbulence –

the flame now licks

the candles side –

the meltdown of the globe

began precisely

with the strike

of that first match.

Today the bombs

rain down; a patterned globe

emits the stench

of burning flesh.

          

   Malcolm Evison